“Bird Brain”? Thanks For The Compliment!

Regular readers here, and people who know me in general, know that I’m fascinated by UFOs (or UAPs as the government now likes to refer to them as) and the possibilities of alien life. So, you know I’m interested in a new documentary, The Age of Disclosure, which just came out and apparently once again suggests that governments and militaries have know they do exist for decades. What’s more, the U.S. and Russia at least (and possibly other countries like Germany and Britain) have recovered alien aircraft and are working hard to retro-engineer them to understand and copy the amazing technology. That’s almost old news by now. I’ve read that Secretary of State Marco Rubio not only confirms that but says he’s encountered extra-terrestrial intelligent life here. Sounds fascinating and I’ll be looking it up soon.

But to change gears, another thing that has long fascinated me is nature. Birds in particular are dear to me and seem fascinating in their variety and abilities, such as (to point out the obvious), flying. So I loved one of the books I read this fall, Gifts of the Crow, by Marzluff and Angell, two biologists who’ve studied “corvids” for decades.

Corvids is the scientific name for the Crow family, a range of birds that include familiar big, black birds like ravens, crows and their European cousins, the jackdaws, but also magpies and jays such as the Blue Jay. Yes, the familiar and colorful bird that became a baseball symbol is a corvid too; basically a small, colorful crow. I’ve long read that the Corvids are the smartest of birds, but this book confirms that and takes it to another level with its case studies. Anyone who reads it will not use the term “bird brain” as an insult again.

In a nutshell, among the things it highlights are their problem-solving abilities which, to be quite honest about it, surpass some humans; their incredible memories and apparent ability to pass along specific information to new generations; their love of playing; their learning capacity; their ability in some specific cases to seemingly understand a few words of human vocabulary (much like your family dog which learns commands like “stay” or “sit”) and even their very human-like ability to have emotions such as liking, disliking and feeling sorrow. Kinda makes you look at that crow flying by in a different light, doesn’t it?

Among the studies, crows have been able to figure out how to make and use tools. When some food they liked was put in a little basket deep inside a tall jar the bird couldn’t reach, when given some flexible wire strands, more than once the birds figured out they could bend the wire, make a hook and perch on top of the jar, lower the hook and pull upwards with their beak until the basket came out and fell out, giving them their food. Others quickly learned how to drop pebbles in a jar full of water that had food at the bottom, to cause enough water to spill out as to let them reach in and grab the food. Seems like we might have a slimmer but more intelligent class of kids if we made them get their school lunch in such fashion!

Jays given a cache of nuts or acorns to bury for winter have shown an almost infallible ability to recover them all weeks later, even when the ground is covered in snow, or items have been moved around in the scene to make it look different.

There are many records of crows and ravens seeming to just… play. Have fun. They’ve been observed picking up sticks, dropping them, to let the bird below catch it, then fly up and drop it for the other and so on. Some ravens learned how to peel big swaths of bark off trees and use it on windy days as a sort of sailboard; clinging to the bark with their talons as the wind pushes it along. Seeing the world like a bird but without having to expend energy flapping. You could charge people big money to do the same… oh, wait we do already!

There are many references to their ability to recognize and either bond with, or torment specific people for years. One scientist who climbed up to their nests and handled the babies (to band them, weigh them etc., not to harm them) found himself being chased … not only by the parent birds, but soon by other crows in the neighborhood. Astoundingly, this continued for years, even when the birds doing it were shown to be descendants of the originals. And, trying to change clothes or drive a different car didn’t help – the crows still knew!

On the reverse side, people who’ve been kind to them not only get a pass but frequently find the birds delivering them gifts! Many a person has seen a resident crow or raven they feed reliably fly in and drop something man-made, things like bottle caps or keys mostly, shiny and metal, by them. One can only assume the birds are trying to thank the people for their kindness and have the concept at least of natural vs man-made and figure we would like our own stuff better! Perhaps the ultimate example of that was a pair of magpies in Sweden who visited a house with a feeder kept well-stocked by the lady of the house. The man however, disliked them and would throw rocks at them. After awhile, the magpies learned to use the doorbell to get the woman’s attention! Apparently they saw people come and go and noted that when a human pushed that button, someone opened the door. But, they didn’t want to see that rock-throwing man, so yep, they waited until he went out and got in his car and drove before hitting the doorbell. They also gave her little gifts. The man though, was given a different “gift” – they routinely pooped on the window of his car. Not hers though. He tried changing parking places with her; the birds knew it right away and kept delivering to his windshield.

It’s a fascinating book, albeit one that’s quite boring and dry in places. A lot of pages are devoted to actual studies of the birds’ brains, even to the point of successfully giving them MRIs and talking at length about the synapses, thalamuses, hyper-palliums and so on. The short takeaway on all those sections is that the brains are structured similarly to human and monkey ones and occupy at least as much of their heads as do monkey and ape ones. One could almost say they are basically “flying monkeys” albeit a lot less intimidating that the ones in Oz. Unless you throw stones at them.

It got me thinking. Perhaps when the day arrives that a UFO flies down, lands on the White House lawn and opens its invisible door, it’s not going to be a little skinny “Gray” coming out. I think it might be a big, space-age raven.

Where Fiction Crashes Into Fact

It’s been awhile since I took the bait and wrote about one of the writing prompts over at John’s weekly ones on his The Sound of One Hand Typing site. He typically has several such prompts every Tuesday which are well worth checking out, especially if you’re feeling a little writers block.

Which I haven’t had that. In fact, it just seems I have so many projects, I seldom make it back to this page. But this week one really made me think : “how do real world events affect your writing?” It was already a topic I was dealing with in my mind.

As I mentioned in passing here before, I’m writing some fiction …I’m not sure yet if it will be one novel,  or more likely a collection of short stories, maybe even a series of audios, podcasts or something. But I’m about 50 short “chapters” in and am quite pleased with the results thus far.

In brief, it deals with a modern-day couple and their circle of friends and family with sections devoted to looking back to their past and telling about their hometown and all its unusual people and goings-on. Although the characters and the town (set in Canada) are fictitious, it’s meant to come across as real and relatable and there are in fact some references to real-life people, places, events. They often hang out and drink too much coffee at Tim Horton’s, talk of real hockey and baseball players and teams, listen to real music you and I listen to, watch some of the same TV shows and so forth.

Some of that inspiration I actually took from Stephen King’s writing. Although I’ve outgrown being a regular reader of the Maine horror master, I did that in the past and marveled at how realistic and believable his make-believe towns in Maine were. I felt like I could see them in my head and could navigate my way around them if dropped off there. That’s a sense of realism I want to create in my writing as well.

Which leads me to my dilemma. Do I bother to wade into the muck that is the present day? My main characters are reasonably intelligent, can be opinionated, read newspapers (when they were readily found and thus available to be read), and I’m sure would watch some TV news. One is at least loosely associated with a radio station, which has a “news guy”. Elections take place, at home and in the ever-present land to the South, wars rage in various parts of the world, atrocities are being committed, and the news brings dozens of downbeat, depressing stories with it daily for every happy one of a school giving a party for its devoted 86 year-old custodian or a rare bird returning to a place it hadn’t been seen in decades. Do I touch that?

On the one hand, it seems hard not to write about daily news when my characters live in the modern world, have smart phones and are themselves smart. It seems unlikely they’d not be talking about what some politician said over dinner or about some building being blown up overseas while chatting with co-workers. On the other hand, I hope my stories will have a fairly wide appeal and if anything, do a bit to unite rather than divide people. And I want them to be, on the balance, positive or upbeat as much as a few individual bits of them are sad. Nothing wrong with hitting that emotional button on my reader every once in awhile as well but I don’t want to make my readers morose.

So far, my guiding light has been… no, not the Guiding Light, but another long-running TV show, Friends. Friends as most of you know, is among my favorite shows and one of the few I actually don’t mind “binge watching” with my sweetie. It was at or near the top of the ratings for its decade-plus at the turn of the century.

When the world changed, back on 9/11, it as a show had a huge problem. It was set in mid-town New York City. The characters could as likely as not have seen the disaster take place in real time just by looking out their apartment windows. Their jobs, at cafes and bistros and museums near the World Trade Center would have been impacted and in all likelihood, they would have known people who if not killed, at least were close enough to know casualties from it. We were all shocked and horrified; the Friends six would have been devastated, one must think. But, the show was also a comedy. People connected with the characters and cared about them, but they also tuned in every Thursday to laugh with them, and at times at them. It was 30 minutes of weekly escape from the problems of real life for the tens of millions of fans.

There were apparently many tense meetings over it with the NBC people and writers. They considered doing a solemn “very special episode”, maybe with them reflecting on life’s meaning, crying a lot and going to funerals or something. It might be appropriate… but it wouldn’t be fun. It would pile on to the real-life troubles, not lift people out of them.

So they made the decision to carry on business as usual. They did put in a few subtle signs of respect for the victims, like Joey wearing an “NYFD” shirt in one, a “I {heart} NY” design on the famous whiteboard in Joey and Chandler’s apartment in another, but for the most part, they avoided the elephant in the room topic.

Time shows they made the right choice. Ratings went up after that. People still needed, maybe more than ever, a respite from the grim news and 30 minutes to be ready to laugh every week.

So for now, I try to run with that as my way of dealing with what’s going on around us in my fiction. Treat it as a respite. But with each passing headline, I ponder the question more.

What’s your take on the question?

Space Hopping Back To The ’70s With Colin

As I noted a little while back, I’ve been keeping busy on a new writing adventure, which along with my daily music blog and my baseball one, has kept a good chunk of my free time occupied… so I’ve not been showing up here that regularly. But I thought it high time to check in and hope all you are doing fine and give a shout-out to a friend of mine and reader here who’s been busy writing too – Colin, aka Cee Tee Jackson. You might recall I looked at his book No Laughing Matter, that came from his scary heart attack incident a year or two back. Well now Cee Tee is back with a bigger, and largely happier book – A Space Hopper Killed My Hamster! (Spoiler alert – as you find out, a space hopper didn’t actually kill his hamster! Whew!)

It’s a series of posts about his life growing up in Scotland of the ’70s, fitting given that he is a co-organizer of the website Once Upon a Time in the ’70s. The 45 essays cover various memories of his ranging from his earliest memories as a child to being a happening young man enjoying the clubs and music scene of Glasgow with all things embarrassing and pimply thing in between.

The school days, the bullies, the not quite stellar attempts at sports, the family vacations, the Saturday morning TV shows, the Halloweens, the books and comics he enjoyed, through the morphing of his musical tastes and the great acts he saw play live at the Apollo (the Scottish Apollo, that is, not the New York shrine)… it’s all here. Colin’s writing is certainly endearing and relatable, him being in the first person and not embarrassed to admit every foible and folly from the adolescent “losing” his girl to a goof in a long RAF coat with a Yes album under his arm, to his foray into purple platform shoes.

I found it equally relatable, a real head-nodder and at the same time a fascinating look at a different culture. Many things reminded me of my own childhood – the love of rock and pop music (“consider the Seventies scene for a moment,” he writes, “has there ever been a decade that spawned such a variation of widely-appreciated sounds?” Exactly so, Cee Tee no matter which side of the ocean you were on) , some of the bands being the same, collecting sports cards, being less than a born-athlete when trying to play those favored sports, being dressed in nerdy clothes by Moms who had either no fashion sense or saw us as middle-aged Broadway actors, loving reading and so on. Then on the other hand there were lots of references to all things British that I wasn’t familiar with – some of the TV shows, their football and its stars… even the Space Hopper in the title. I’d heard of a Julian Cope song called “Space Hopper” but had no idea it was something of a popular toy over there… I gather a big ball you bounced up and down on. Sadly, I think we made it through his first 20 or so years with no mention of haggis… but the Scottish experience was still a bit different than the Canadian, which I am learning was a bit different again from most Americans.

A fun easy read, I thoroughly recommend it if you grew up or look back fondly on the ’70s or just if you’re curious as to what being young in Scotland was like back then. It’s available at a reasonable price in paperback or for an even more reasonable FREE as a Kindle download book on Amazon. Now that’s a value that makes those penny candies of 50 years ago seem over-priced, isn’t it!

Stormy Weather? And What I’ve Been Up To

Once again, it’s been awhile since I’ve posted here, so let’s touch base. And what’s a better way of doing so than with the Weekly Writing Prompts over at John’s The Sound of One Hand Typing site.

One of his suggestions this week is “do you like thunderstorms?” Great question and I find most people have fairly strong opinions about it. My answer is I love ’em… ** . With a couple of big asterisks.

In general, I do. I find them exciting, so much so I’ll usually stop what I’m doing if possible and go to watch out the window if there’s a humdinger of a storm outside – the belting rain, swaying trees, house-vibrating roars of thunder and the accompanying flashes of lightning. Fascinating, exhilarating.  God’s fireworks, outdoing what man does, even on the 4th of July.

I grew up in southern Canada, where our summers are comparatively brief, but we saw our share of good storms annually, quite often in spring and fall. It was one of the main reasons I think I got to be so fascinated with weather and forecasting as a kid. I guess I always was a bit curious as to what the so many different kinds of clouds were and found it interesting it could be really sweaty one day and chilly the very next. I wondered why. But it was those sudden, brief intense storms that occasionally blew in that made me take to the weather books.  My family spent a few summer vacations in Florida and there, you could almost count on a big storm every day around dinnertime. It was exciting and cooled the place off after a sweltering day. I used to love seeing them out over the Gulf as they moved off in the evening, lightning illuminating the otherwise invisible towering thunderclouds.

I grew to understand weather maps and radars, and kept weather records for years. Tornadoes, although obviously terrible in what they could do, fascinated me most – so unpredictable, so powerful. Things like how can a house be flattened, yet the one beside it be intact, how could a stick get blown straight through a large tree, and so on amazed me and spurred me on to read more, watch more science shows. I’ve seen a few twisters in my day now – one a tiny little rain-wrapped one that spun by no more than a football field away from my apartment. Stood outside the back doors and watched the storm and noticed the weird tight spin in the rain; didn’t really know for sure it was one until afterwards when I walked around the neighborhood and saw the clear path it took, shingles ripped off roofs, large branches torn off, but only for that straight line maybe 20 yards wide. Fascinating.

I enjoyed the show Storm Chasers. It followed a trio of teams of guys (with the exception of one girlfriend who sometimes tagged along, it was all youngish males, adrenalin junkies basically) trying to guess where severe storms would break out on a given day and barrel along the highways and byways to find them. One team mostly wanted stock photos to sell and video clips for TV news; another was working on an I-max film and the third one were more scientific and tried to drop probes to collect data from storms going over them. Even though I figured much of the personality conflict between the dudes was staged for the camera, the storms they observed and ran into though made it a “must see” for me for a couple of years. That’s when I came to my first asterisk about storms – I love them… when I’m safely inside. I hate being caught outside when lightning starts flashing around me and also learned that they aren’t to be trifled with on the road.

Watching Storm Chasers, and having a weather channel on TV at home, some years ago, I felt inclined to try storm chasing myself. So, one hot day off, a severe storm was trucking in at a good clip towards my area and it became “tornado warned”. I looked out the window and could see ominous, dark-based clouds towering to the west; watched the radar on TV and could see how it was developing. I could tell approximately what it’s path would be and decided to load up some camera gear into my old, rather rickety car and try to see it up close. This was, I must add, before smart phones. The radar was on TV at home, not on a device I had with me in the car. I thus played it by ear… or eyes actually.

As it happened, I drove directly into the storm. As tornadoes typically develop near the trailing edge of large storms, the much, much smarter thing to do is skirt around the southern edge of the storm and come up behind it. But I found myself in the middle of this supercell on rural roads I wasn’t overly familiar with. Ones with big ditches! The rain got harder and harder, and eventually outdid my windshield wipers capacity to clear it, then, surprise, surprise, hail started pounding and making the road slippery and appear almost snowy. I had no choice but to try and pull over, without ditching it, stop, put on my four-way flashers and hope for the best.

I was lucky, nothing happened, and after maybe five minutes, the rain eased up and hail stopped and I carried on. Eventually, when it had passed by, I did indeed see two funnel clouds in the distance; whether they touched down or not I couldn’t tell because of hills between them and me. I got a couple of so-so photos which I ended up losing anyhow. And I got a good lesson, that storm-chasing was for professionals, with very sturdy vehicles and good radar capabilities!

So inside, yay, outside, nay. The other asterisk – I like ’em when I’m awake. The older I get the less I can sleep through thunder or even the flashes of lightning, which in the wee hours travel for miles further than the sound does. I like storms, but I like getting a good night’s sleep even better as I speed through my 50s!

 

By the way, the reason I’ve not been here so much lately is nothing bad. I’ve begun writing fiction again and am working on a series of short stories about an ordinary town that, like all ordinary places, isn’t quite so ordinary when you dig into it! Most of my spare “writing” hours, when not doing my music blog (A Sound Day) have been given over to that project… of which I’ll tell you more soon.

Ten Lines Possibly Better Suited To Being On Paper

It’s been awhile since I’ve been here with anything new, so it’s a good day to revisit John’s The Sound of One Hand Typing and his weekly writing prompts. There’s always some good conversation-starters in there! One of his suggestions this week was to do a post in just ten sentences. So let’s give that a go with something I was pleased to find out last week.

I’m rather “old school.” But, according to various studies published in GE Editing, that’s good because “old’s cool!”. Or at least it is if you write out grocery shopping lists on paper, which I do pretty much every time I head towards the supermarket. I much prefer doing that to looking at a list on my phone.

Apparently that means, for starters, by being organized people like me tend to spend less when shopping because we stick to the list. Paper lists help us avoid digital distractions, which in turn helps our attention skills but lowers stress at the same time. They found “paper listers” fell asleep easier at night and have better memories, because actually handwriting things “sparks extra neural activity in areas tied to learning and recall.” We crave tactile experiences and have a streak of nostalgia which is good for “higher life satisfaction.” So yay me, yay all of you who don’t care how old-fashioned we look while putting the pasta and sauce into the cart.

Now I need to write myself a note to see what they say about people who read paper books instead of e-books!

Ten and out…

Enough Context To Drive Me Batty!

Context is everything. One of the Big Bang Theory‘s Sheldon’s best lines comes when he goes to a friend’s for dinner and they say ‘Hope you’re hungry!”. He ponders and responds “Hope you’re hungry – a friendly greeting here, a cruel taunt if you’re in the Sudan.”

For me this week, the lesson in context came while shopping. I was doing my morning shopping at the local supermarket as I often do; it’s rarely crowded at that time and I’m often going by it anyway. Usually it’s quick and uneventful, but not this day. Walking in, one of the first things I see is a brown streak coming towards me, close to the ground. A couple of stockboys in chase. As it speeds by, I see clearly it’s a bat! More store employees join in the chase while various cashiers are waving their arms around. I keep moving along towards the produce and, lo and behold, here it comes again, making a beeline at me. This no doubt prompts me to pull some dance moves the likes of which no one has seen since the Dancing with the Stars bloopers tape as I try to figure out which way to contort myself to avoid the furry projectile. I didn’t have the right ones, it turned out. The little critter flew straight onto the calves of my jeans! This resulted in an involuntary all-mighty shake which in turn flung the winged creature back into flight. I was very grateful I’d happened to wear very loose, very thick jeans that day. If I’d been in shorts, I’d probably be going for rabies shots, “just in case”.

Two lessons in context. One, shorts – great for around the house in summer, not great for shopping! Two, bats – love ’em when they’re out at dusk eating mosquitoes, looking cool under the streetlights. Not cool as a fashion accessory!

Adolescence. For Once ‘Must See TV’ Lives Upto Description

Alright, I’m on the bandwagon, a vehicle I usually avoid when it comes to television. In many cases TV dramas that everyone’s talking about and are raved about with phrases like “appointment TV” or “brilliantly dark” thrown at them don’t seem to appeal to me at all. But this week, I’m on board with the critics because Adolescence is an extraordinary piece of cinema in every way. And the critics agree. It has a 99% approval rating on Rotten Tomatoes. It’s already being touted for Emmys and in a few short weeks has become the fourth most-watched “series” in its streaming service’s history. Netflix has made a masterpiece here.

Adolescence is a British drama set very much in the here and now. It could be called a “crime drama” or maybe a “psychological thriller” but neither one does full justice to the extent of the show. Some wrongly call it a “Whodunnit?” but the show’s producers rightly say it’s much more of a “whydunnit?”. The answer to the “who” comes reasonably early on in the four episodes. Each one of the episodes covers one aspect of a horrendous crime that was committed on the streets of an unnamed north English city. And here’s the kicker, the “can’t look away for a second” thing that makes it an extraordinary experience to watch – each of the four, approximately one-hour episodes is shot in a continuous manner done in real time. There are no pauses or edits. It’s rather breath-taking the way the camera follows the actors wherever they go. No, “insert commercial break” then have an entirely different set hours later for the next scene. If the action begins in Point A and gets to Point B an hour later, we’re along for the ride to see how. And what transpired in that hour. It’s brilliantly done and as The Guardian newspaper puts it, “it’s no flashy gimmick.” It’s a unique technique that “ratchets up… the real time tension.”

It deals with, as I noted already a grisly crime, but then explores what led to it and some of the consequences it had that few would ordinarily think of. As such it’s a fine piece of psycho-analysis. The acting is first-rate and scarily believable; relatable even for the most part. By the first action sequence, about four minutes in, I was on the edge of my seat the rest of the way.

SPOILER ALERT : Now, I’ll give you an idea of what the show is about, and what each of the four episodes entails, but if you haven’t seen it, you might want to skip over to end of this post , where the italics end, so as not to lose any of the element of surprise when you do watch it… and you should do that. Even the video trailer might spoil some of the more intense moments the first time you see it.

The show involves a teen or tween girl who was viciously stabbed to death one night in a parking lot. Police quickly apprehend the suspect… a diminutive, cute lad a bit younger than the girl was. In the first episode, you are beside him as he gets taken into custody, processed and put into a police interrogation. His shaken dad is with him and wants desperately to believe in his child’s innocence, and does until he sees the evidence the police have.

Episode two takes the police to his school, to talk to his friends and other classmates as well as the teachers, some of whom appear entirely disinterested in their job or the kids’ goings-on. The lead detective has a son of his own in the same school, and gets to see what school is like these days, gets an inside look at just how important social media is in most of their lives and how bullying is an everyday occurrence, both on the yard and on their phones.

The third episode has a psychologist, played by a tough-on-the-outside when she needs to be, breaking on the inside young woman. Erin Doherty should win some sort of award for performance as “Briony”, the psychologist here. It’s right up there with the Silence of the Lambs interviews. She gets him to open up a little about his motivation, and what his life as a rather unpopular 13 year old is like; gets the full brunt of his mercurial mood swings.

The fourth episode is arguably the most wretching one, following the killer’s dad (played by Steven Graham, called “the best actor working today” by the Guardian) on his 50th birthday, about a year after the murder. We mostly know how a crime like this can rip apart victim’s families, this time we see the effects it has on the killer’s kin too as they try to maintain some normalcy but fear that’s too lofty a goal to ever achieve again.

Graham, one of the leads, came up with the basic idea for the show after noticing a string of violent crimes that were being committed around Liverpool, his hometown, by young “boys” most would assume too young and innocent to be cold-blooded killers. “I just thought ‘What’s happening? How have we come to this? What’s going on with society?” Good questions indeed, equally applicable on this side of the ocean.

Adolescence. Five stars, two thumbs up from me. Not a cheery watch, but a very intelligent, even-handed one shot in memorable fashion that will make you wonder “what’s going on with society?” as well. And more scarily, if you’re a parent, perhaps make you wonder “could that be my kid?” I hope the show starts a few family discussions that perhaps might stop that one kid from becoming “that kid.”

Can You Tell The Difference?

Once again John at The Sound of One Hand Typing came up with some good writing prompts for people last week. One was to write a post in a mere ten lines, so here we go…

I got a counterfeit coin in my change at the supermarket this week. Actually, not so much counterfeit as an obvious fake – a medal the exact size and weight of a quarter, but gold-colored and with some sort of angel on it. When I looked at this, at first I thought it was one of those Presidential dollar coins you occasionally see which stores don’t like since their cash registers don’t have a compartment for. But upon looking more closely, I saw it wasn’t. It might have been a casino token, or maybe a little “good luck” medal some religious charities send out with letters asking for donations. It doesn’t really matter. I wasn’t mad, I was more incredulous. I felt sorry wondering how hard up you’d have to be to try and pass off a fake 25 cent coin at a store. And also wonder how those high-tech coin sorters they utilize missed something that a human eye could pick up on at a glance. Maybe people are still better than machines after all?

Customer (Dis)service

Once again John at The Sound of One Hand Typing has come up with some good writing prompts for people this week. One was to talk about something I learned this month. So here we are –

They say you learn something new every day, and hopefully that’s true, so I must learn a lot in a month. Even a short one like February. One thing that I learned this week was I made a good call not buying an HP printer last month!

Our Canon printer was acting up, not printing evenly or at times, at all. This disappointed me greatly as it wasn’t very old and I’ve been a loyal fan of Canon – Canon cameras, Canon printers, Canon you name it – for several decades. Generally they’ve always been top quality – when I nudged customers towards the brand when I worked in camera stores, it wasn’t because I got incentives to do so.

But this was the second straight printer by them we’ve had issues with. My sweetie saw an HP on sale at a good price and had me go check it out. I almost bought it based on price and the theory that “maybe it’s better quality than my Canon. Likely couldn’t be much worse.” It was supposed to come with something like a month’s free ink too. Sounded too good to be true, but when I read the box’s small print, I began to think it was. The “free” ink was only if you subscribed for a year to their service. They’d track the printer online (hmm – sketchy!) and mail replacement inks when they deemed the inks were running low. Of course, that meant paying the price they chose for the inks, without competition from other vendors or companies and relying on their opinions on how much ink I’d be needing. What’s more, it clearly stated that the printer was set up to not function at all if their own proprietary ink cartridges weren’t used. Forget about trying to save a few bucks getting a store brand equivalent. Those factors alone made me decide against it.

Well this week, my opinion seemed extra validated. Not only were those two very points highlight by PC World magazine as HP negatives but thanks to some whistleblower in the electronics company, we learned about their policy of bad customer service. Yes, policy! The lack of service customers might have experienced with them wasn’t a result of understaffing or reps who would rather look at tik Tok on their phones than answer calls. It turns out that at least their European branch had an actual policy in place to make any customers phoning to ask for help wait a minimum of 15 minutes!

Their corporate talking head tried to put a good spin on it and explain it away as a way to help the confused callers. “We found that many of our customers were not aware of the digital support options”, they declared. By making them wait… and wait… while hearing a pre-recorded message assuring them their call was important to HP… but why not look at their FAQ section on the website while you wait, they were doing their customers a favor. Thanks HP. As the old saying goes, “with friends like that, who needs enemies?”

After the story broke, they say they’ve revoked that policy and they also haven’t said whether such was the North American business model as well. I’d be surprised if it wasn’t.

We all know that we are being fed a line of you-know-what when we have to wait on phone lines for ages to get to talk to a real person when phoning large corporations for help and they’re telling us they’re having an “unusual call volume” and are doing their very best to assist us. What we didn’t know was that, in the case of HP at least, it wasn’t indifference to us or our time. They were deliberately trying to annoy us and not provide the service we wanted.

That Canon printer? I grudgingly put new inks in it, did a couple of printer head cleans and now it’s working – mostly – again. It will hopefully do so for a few years more and when it inevitably quits for good, will be replaced. Another Canon? Possibly. We do know what brand the new one won’t be!

I Started A Joke…

I changed the calendar! The Bee Gees once sang “I started a joke.” Well I believe I started a joke… that became a meme! I’ll explain.

As most of you probably know, today is Super Bowl Sunday. Whether or not you’re a football fan, you undoubtedly know it’s the Big Game, this year between Kansas City and Philadelphia. Even if you’re not a fan, there’s a good chance you might be tuning in to see if Taylor Swift shows up or see the famous commercials, which are often made especially for the game. It’s been like that for years now.

But back about a decade, I noticed that if you wrote it together, all as one word – superbowl – if you split it one letter differently, you got something altogether different. I was quite pleased with myself and went to Facebook and probably Twitter and proclaimed

Happy Superb Owl Day!

I’d never seen anyone call it that or write it that way to celebrate nocturnal birds of prey. I felt quite clever, I’m sure, and found a good picture of a nice owl (like the one above which unfortunately I did not take)  to put in the post. I can’t remember now, but I think a handful of people “liked” the comment and a few might have put a smiley emoji or something in reply. I said it to a couple of people in person and got maybe a “tee hee” or very faint smile as a reply to my astounding wit. I believe I followed up the next year on the football day and repeated the gag, somehow or other on the Social media… then even I got tired of making the same joke over and over. Fast forward to last year, and I see “superb owl” trending on things like Yahoo the day of the ballgame!

This year, the phrase is everywhere. Denver Zoo has officially declared it Superb Owl day there. NPR did a feature on owls labeled as Superb Owl. USA Today has an online story titled “It’s almost Superb Owl 2025, so please enjoy these cool bird pics.” Google it and tons of results come up. The birds are getting more attention than ever before. 

Owls are superb; perhaps more so than football!

So if you’re not into football, Taylor Swift or President Trump (who’s rumored to be at the ballgame) you might want to step outside at dusk and listen, watch for things taking flight. And enjoy Superb Owl day. Me, I’ll probably be pondering how I have written books, articles, blogs and may end up changing the culture… with a little off the cuff joke.

I suppose the moral of it is to never under-estimate the power of your words. Or that, man, owls are cool, aren’t they?

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